Tuesday, August 18, 2009

3 Years Ago Today!

3 Years Ago Today I saw this lil face for the very first time!

And from that moment on my life was changed
I loved more than I'd ever loved before
I saw the world in a total different light
I was a mommy for the very first time
He was mine, sent from God
To take care of and love while he was here on earth
But on this day
August 18,2006
The farthest thing from my mind was how long he would actually be here on earth with me.
I never thought that I'd out live him
The only thing I can remember was that I was so excited to finally see his lil face (he was beautiful) and starting our lives together.
Our new lives at that!
Things would no longer be the way they were. I'd make sure of that.
I would love him like no one else ever could
I would teach him everything I could
It was no longer about me
Cuddly, Soft, Happy, & Silly...Very Silly.
Gavin & I had such a special bond.
Yes he was my first born
But he was also my very best friend.
He pulled me through every single day.
Smart amazing lil man of mine.
A short 21 months later he left for heaven
And again my world would never be the same.
This lil boy has changed my life a million times over in his short life.
And there's no one I miss more than him.
He brought so much sunshine into everyone's life
And still does to this day.
I still learn something new from you every single day.
I miss you and love you more day to day.
Your mommy I'll always be.
And I thank God for that!

Christmas 2006

Gavin Turns 1

Baby Shrek

Halloween 2007

Gavin & Myriah 2008

My Lil Son & I

Spring 2008

Josh & Gavin

Gavin & Ella 2008

(Thanks to Brian Thomas for sharing the below poem with me today)

You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times

And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you

But the reason why I'm broken,

the reason why I cry is how long must I wait to be with you...

I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways

The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know

But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same

Cause I'm still here so far away from home


Aunt Tiff said...

My thoughts are with you today!!

Aunt Tiff said...

ok so I read this before you finished it and now I am sitting here sobbing!! Your strength amazes me! How lucky he his to have you as his mother. My heart breaks for you and my prayers are with you!! Thank you for sharing these beautiful pictures and thoughts!!

Anonymous said...

He looked good as Shrek! All you would of had to do is paint his face green! He's much cutier then Shrek of course. Happy Birthday baby Gavin! You may be gone but you will NEVER be forgotten!

Deni said...


My heart aches for you! You will be in my thoughts today.

KaNdRa and JaReD said...

I could not imagine! You are so strong. My little Gavin and I have the same bond and I couldn't imagine ever losing that. I promise to never take it for granted. Your Gavin is such a cutie. He makes an even better looking angel:)
Were thinking of you.

{our happy nest} said...

that was beautiful seana. you are so strong it amazes me. he was a beautiful little boy and i know it will be the most amazing day when you can have him back in your arms! love you!

Kyle Katie and Talen Slone said...

Shauna, Hi, this is Katie Slone or you might remember me as Katie Brazda lol I used to work with you at fashion bug lol I just happen to come across your blog and wanted to know how you were doing? Your little boy is beautiful! HOpe you are doing ok, take care of yourself.... my prayers and with you I am so sorry to hear about Gavin!

Matt n Jessica said...

What a beautiful post about your little angel. My thoughts and prayers are with you. You have so much strength it amazes me!

Dawna Greer said...

Sorry I didn't see this post sooner but you expressed your feelings beautifully and it is special to see pictures of your precious Gavin. What a hard trial to have to pass through in life but you will continue to learn and be strengthened by your experience and will be able to help others through their trials.